Do you ever realize just how much you have to say to the world? When the world and so-called social media are filled with everyone’s opinions on everything from the most basic to the most complex issue? And you realize you’ve got a ton to say about different things. But where do you start? Do you start with some sort of philosophy of your way of life and being in the world? Or do you start with commenting on people’s posts you dig on some platform or another? Or do you write little quips on Twitter? But regardless, you realize you have a ton to say and that if you don’t say it, you’ll never get it out there in the world! Never! Lost forever!
And yet … … …
Living in Fear
And yet there is fear in all of this. Fear of judgment, fear of the unknown, fear of life itself. How much of that fear stops you from saying what you’ve always wanted to say to the world?
I woke up last week thinking this thought. Boy, do I have a lot to say. Why am I hiding all the things I have to say? Normally I don’t like “Why” questions. They put you on the defensive. “Why did you do what you did the other night?” Or “why do you think …” to me, “why” questions make me clam up. But as my therapist said, the “Why” question can get to that nugget of the truth that’s there for someone. But for me, my knee jerk reaction is to go, “uh, I dunno.” When really, I know something. I know why I did something, even if I can’t put it into words at first.
So I had to ask, Why, am I not talking as much? Why, when people tell me I’m humorous, that I have insight, I usually say, “ok, thanks.” It’s fear. It’s fear of exposure, vulnerability, the shame of maybe saying something that will offend. This is hilarious because I’m the person who urges people to say what they want to say when it comes to disability advocacy. The offense is more possible when you don’t say what you want to say because then you don’t learn.
The Exposure Business
It’s so easy to just be swallowed up by the internet and social media. But if you don’t talk, no one finds your website or social media channels. And then, you don’t get any business! You don’t get noticed for that insight or humor because you’ve been hiding in your little hole. I like my little hole, there’s coffee, and beer, and baseball, and music. But hiding and not saying anything doesn’t help my business. I’m in the Exposure Business. My own exposure. For the nudists out there, no, not That kind of exposure. But if I don’t expose parts of myself, then I don’t tell stories that can possibly change someone’s life. Stories that make them think about their actions and attitudes.
At the end of the workday, though, I love what I do. Because I get to perform. I get to entertain. I get to teach. I get to coach. But none of that happens if I just stay shut in my little shell with my mouth closed.
Where do you feel exposed? Where do you feel like your shell is helpful and where is it unhelpful? Let me know in the comments. Or if you’d like to learn more about my Stop Look and Listen Coaching program to help you get out of that shell, Book a session with me now.